Learning to Love Yourself

My friend Jen wrote this amazing article today about whether you can lose weight simply by loving yourself.

Essentially, Jen references a pair of women who were featured on our local news the other night. These women practiced "self-acceptance"--the art of loving your body, accepting it in its imperfect state, and quitting the constantly-on-a-diet roller coaster.

I found this possibility fascinating. It resonates with truths that I believe in and have only just recently been starting to recognize.

Once I heard a story of a woman who's doctor advised her to lovingly spread lotion on her body twice a day. She was morbidly obese and at first the thought of not only seeing her naked body but touching it filled her with dread. As she had gotten heavier and heavier she had seriously disconnected from her body, barely acknowledging it in her daily hygiene routine.

Yet, she faithfully began the practice her doctor recommended. At first she was disgusted, then she grew more accepting. Her skin became smooth and supple, moisturized by the twice-daily lotion.

But soon, she began to notice something else.

She enjoyed the moments of quiet attention to her body. And her body slowly responded to the love by releasing much of the weight she'd been hanging on to for so long.

That story has lingered in the back of my mind for some time now. But now, after reading Jen's article, it's jumping to the forefront, demanding I pay it some attention.

I really love the notion of self-acceptance. Of loving yourself even in your imperfection.

But the idea also kind of frightens me. I'm not sure why. Maybe because I really don't love myself? Certainly not my body.

My body has always betrayed me. I couldn't break bones when I tried to so I could get attention from my family when I was little. I enjoyed sex taken from me by an abuser. I've always used my body as a weapon--against others, against myself, to punish, to control.

I know, maybe a bit too much information. But this is a safe place for me. A place to face these scary truths. Because they are mine. And hey, maybe this is the first step in finally accepting myself. In finally coming to love myself, from the inside out.