Does this make me a big, fat (haha) loser?
Maybe. That's why I'm back here. Because I need you. I need to be accountable to someone, and the people in my real life probably wouldn't appreciate my constant whining about my body. Because I think about it all the time.You look at me and I'm thinking, "Wait. How fat do I look at this very moment?"
My husband puts his arms around me in bed and his hand grazes the flab at my stomach. I stop breathing. Belatedly, I suck in my gut--but it's too late because he's already felt it. And I wait. I'm wondering, how grossed out is he?
He still loves me. And my friends don't say anything. And in general I still feel decently good about myself. Maybe better than I felt this time last year. But I'm still hyper aware. Still need to improve my treatment of myself. Still looking for a better, healthier me.
If you're here, how are you doing? Where are you in your weight-loss journey?
